Originally Published in 2004
One of my favorite fairy tales is called “The Knights of the Silver Shield”. This tale can be found in the Moral Compass, edited by Bill Bennett. I’d like to tell you about it because it illustrates a virtue that is very important for home schooling: obedience.
Once upon a time there was a castle in the forest. The forest was a dark and dangerous place, and it was inhabited by evil giants. In the castle there were knights who had made it their job to help travelers through the forest, and to fight the giants whenever they could.
These knights had wonderful suits of armor. They had red plumes on their helmets, so that they could be seen from afar, and called upon by those in distress, and they had marvelous, magic shields.
These shields had been made by a great magician. They were made of silver and could be dazzling in the sunshine, but they had a very special property. When a shield was first given to a newly made knight it would be dull, rather cloudy. As the knight did heroic deeds, the shield would begin to shine. On the other hand, if the knight proved to be cowardly or lazy, or if he let the giants get the better of him, or if he did not care about the travelers in the forest, then the shield grew more and more cloudy, and the knight would be ashamed to carry it.
“St. Thomas teaches that the moral virtues dispose us to the intellectual life. The moral virtues bring the passions in line, and help the student stay focused. Thus, the student is able to learn, without fighting his appetites, or without being distracted....”
-- Laura M. Berquist
Even more wonderfully, when a knight had fought particularly well and won a victory, or when he had done some especially hard errand for the lord of the castle and was successful, the shield would not only grow brighter, but a golden star would appear on its surface, as a sign to all of his glorious deed. This was, of course, a great honor, and usually didn’t happen to a knight until he was older and had been in many battles. In fact, at the time of this story, the only knight who had the golden star was the lord of the castle. But each of the knights was hoping that he would soon win his golden star, and each knew that the star was never mistakenly given, so it was a sure and certain sign of great deeds done.
Now the giants decided to make a concerted effort to defeat these pesky knights, and the castle geared up for battle. Everyone was excited, none more so than Sir Roland, one of the youngest of the knights. He was a brave knight, whose shield had already begun to shine, and he was hoping to be in the thick of this new battle, so that he could show what knightly stuff he was made of.
Just as the company was ready to go out to battle, the lord of the castle came to them and said, “One brave knight must stay behind and guard the gateway of the castle. No one must be allowed to enter until we all return.” Then he looked around the assembled knights and pointed to Sir Roland. “I have chosen you, Sir Roland, to stay and guard the castle.” Sir Roland was so disappointed that he shut his visor and bit his lip. He didn’t want anyone else to see how much this hurt. He almost spoke up and said what he thought, which was that the lord was making a mistake. But he didn’t say it, and he struggled successfully against his feelings. He went to look after his duties and make sure the portcullis was in good working order, and that the bell that was the signal to raise and lower the drawbridge was able to ring as it should. Then he stood and watched the other knights march off to battle.
For a long time, nothing happened at the castle, and then one of the knights came limping back. He told Sir Roland that he had been hurt and that therefore he would exchange places with Sir Roland. He would stay and look after the castle and Sir Roland could go off to the battle as a fresh warrior. At first Sir Roland’s heart leapt for joy, but then he remembered that the lord of the castle had put him in charge, and, in fact, had told him specifically, “Do not let anyone in this castle until we all return.” So, Sir Roland said sadly, “No, I cannot do that. A knight be longs where his commander has put him, and my place is therefore here. Yours is at the battle.” The other knight was ashamed when he heard that, and he went back to the battle.
There was another long period of waiting, and then an old beggar woman turned up at the gate of the castle. She asked if she could come in and have some food. Sir Roland said she was welcome to the food, and he would have a servant bring it to her, but that today she couldn’t come in. As they were waiting for the food, the old woman said that she had heard the battle was going badly for the knights, and she told Sir Roland, “You should get out there and fight. Your company needs you.” He said that there was nothing he’d like better to do, but his commander had put him here. The old woman said,” Sure. I see. You are really a coward and were just looking for an excuse to stay out of battle.” Then she laughed.
Sir Roland was very angry, and he would have liked to fight and show that he was not a coward, but you can’t fight an old woman, so he just waited for the servant to bring the food, and giving it to her, Sir Roland shut the gate.
Soon, the old woman went away, and a little old man turned up at the gate. He called for Sir Roland by name, and told him, “Sir Roland! You should not be here when your commander is in such desperate need. Listen! I have here a magic sword, and I will give it to you. With this sword you can defeat the enemy, save your commander and be the greatest knight of all.”
This was a serious temptation for Sir Roland. After all, he had been called by name, and he had a very healthy respect for magicians, so he thought this magician must know what he was doing. But as he reached out for the sword, he remembered the words of his commander, and the bridge and gateway that had been entrusted to him. Even though they weren’t very exciting, they had been put in his charge. So he called out to the magician, “No, I can’t take it.” He really wanted to, so he closed up the gate and made sure the drawbridge was up, more so that he wouldn’t go out, than that the magician wouldn’t come in.
Then, as he looked out across the moat he saw a wonderful thing. The little old magician changed shape. He grew bigger and bigger, until he was revealed as one of the giants. The giant shook his fist at the castle and stomped back into the forest. Sir Roland uttered a sigh of relief that he had not taken the sword and left the castle unguarded. The giant would have taken possession and the castle would have been lost without a fight!
Just then the lord and the knights returned, victorious, from the battle. Sir Roland was excited and could hardly wait to hear all about it. First, the lord went to his seat and the knights gathered round, no doubt checking out each other’s shields to see who had done the most glorious deeds. Sir Roland made sure the gate was closed and then started to take the key to the gate up to the lord. He was ready to make his report, though what he really wanted to do was hear about the battle. As he approached the dais, one of the knights cried out, “The shield! The shield! Sir Roland’s shield!”
Everyone turned to look. Sir Roland, who couldn’t see his shield’s surface, because it was on his left arm, wondered what was going on and hoped that he hadn’t done anything wrong. Maybe his shield had turned cloudy?
But no, what had happened was that the golden star, the highest mark of knightly honor, had appeared on Sir Roland’s shield. The lord commanded Sir Roland to report. “Have you been attacked?” he asked. “Were there giants here? Did you hold them off yourself?”
“No, my lord,” said Sir Roland. “Only one giant was here, and he just went back to the forest when he found he couldn’t get into the castle. I really haven’t done anything here today, sir.” And then he reported in full. There was silence when he finished and then the lord of the castle spoke, “Men make mistakes, but our silver shields are never wrong. Sir Roland has fought and won the hardest battle of all today.” And the others all rose and saluted Sir Roland.
Now, what had Sir Roland done that was so hard and so wonderful? He had been obedient to his lord, and he had done his duty. He had done his duty faithfully, whole heartedly, even when it might appear to others (or even to himself) that what he was doing was of little worth. As a matter of fact, had he been a less obedient and faithful knight, the battle of the others in the forest would have been of little use, for the castle itself would have been taken.
We know from Scripture the importance of obedience. God tells us, “I want obedience, not sacrifice.” Now, this makes one think about sacrifice, and about obedience. Clearly, the sacrifice spoken of in this section of Scripture is bloody sacrifice, as in the sacrifice of animals. One might think that God is opposing sacrifice to obedience, but as a matter of fact, obedience is sacrifice. It is a different kind of sacrifice, the sacrifice of one’s will.
When one is obedient, he subjects himself to the person to whom he is obedient. He says, as Christ did in the Garden, “Not my will but thine be done.” That means he gives up his will, or desire, in order to be in conformity with the will of the person he is obeying. That is a sacrifice.
There are some who would object that it isn’t a good thing to give up one’s own will. They would say that to do so is demeaning and makes one a slave. This would be true if the person to whom one is obedient were a tyrant, that is, if he were ordering all things to himself, i.e. to benefit himself. Then the obedient man would be ordering himself to another man’s good, and that is not the action of a free man. In fact, that is the definition of a slave.
However, when one is obedient to God, one is obedient to Someone whose intention is the good of the one obeying. That is, God in tends our happiness, and He asks for obedience in matters where, by being obedient, we are doing what will make us truly happy, both naturally and supernaturally. When God tells us to do something, it is because the thing to be done is in accordance with our nature, and leads to the eternal blessedness that He has offered to us.
So, we are not being ordered to the private good of the authority, but to a good that we share with that authority. This is true in some measure of any legitimate authority, as in the case of Sir Roland. Sir Roland did not stay behind to guard the castle for the personal good of the lord of the castle, but for the common good of all the citizens of the castle, of which he is one.
The primary consequence of the fall of Adam was the loss of what is called original justification. In men there is a natural hierarchy of powers. The appetites, both the concupiscible, such as the desire for food and drink, and the irascible, such as the passion of anger, are subordinated to the will, which is subordinated to the intellect. That is, in a rightly ordered man, as Adam and Eve were before the Fall, the intellect informs the will, and the will moves in accordance with the presentation of the intellect. A man with this original justice (so called because each faculty does exactly what it ought) will not choose an object he knows by reason is bad. Further, his appetites will only incline to, or be aroused by, an object that his intellect presents as good.
Since the Fall, man has struggled with insubordination. The various faculties are often inclined to a good that is not appropriate. My intellect might determine that something is bad for me, some sensible good like a chocolate bar, but my will and appetite are inclined to it anyway. This is likely to make me unhappy. After I give in and eat the chocolate bar, I’m sorry.
Now, when I have the virtue of obedience, as Sir Roland did, then, though my appetites might move to an object that is inappropriate, my habit of obedience will prevent me from doing what I first want to do. This is why, by the way, it is much, much easier to give up chocolate and stick to it, when you give it up for Lent, then when you just decide you need to lose a few pounds.
And, as one is obedient repeatedly, his appetites gradually fall in line, and he does what is right, and wants to do what is right.
This is as true for children as it is for adults. Obedience makes the acquisition of virtue much easier. Further, it is by the virtue of obedience that children participate in the prudence of their parents. Prudence is the queen of the virtues. It is by prudence that we know what to do when. Prudence tells us to read tonight, or to clean up the kitchen. Prudence tells us to explain in detail the motivation of our actions, or not to do so. Prudence orders the other virtues. But prudence requires experience and children do not have experience. They can’t be prudent. But by being obedient, they can participate in the prudence of their parents.
I usually talk about intellectual matters. I try to help people with methodology, and curriculum choices. One might say, rightly, that I have gone far afield in this article. But there is a relationship between moral and intellectual virtue. St. Thomas teaches that the moral virtues dispose us to the intellectual life. The moral virtues bring the passions in line, and help the student stay focused. Thus, the student is able to learn, without fighting his appetites, or without being distracted.
For a child, obedience is as close to the moral virtues as he comes. How do we engender obedience in our children? There are a number of actions we can take. One is to give good example. It is very hard to convince children to be obedient to us, if we are not obedient to legitimate authority. Another way is to give the children other models, especially through literature. To have our children read stories of the saints, and the kind of stories suggested by Monica Speech in Program for Achieving Character Education, will help them desire to be obedient.
But most importantly, we need to love our children. We need to love them and show them that we love them. Why? Because love engenders love. A priest at a retreat I attended once asked, “Why do you love God?” and thinking about it, I realized that I love God because He loves me. He loves me so much He sent His only Son to die for me.
When one loves he moves to the thing loved. When one knows, he brings the thing known to himself. Love moves to union in a way that knowledge doesn’t. When you love your children and show them that you do so, they will love you, and they will want to be one with you, and they will not want to do those things that pain you. They will be obedient out of a desire to please you, and thus to be one with you.
Now, that doesn’t’ mean that you should always give your children what they want. That’s not love, it’s the easy way out. But you do need to make it clear that you love your children, that your actions and decision are motivated by love, and that your goal is the child’s own good. They need to see that you are not ordering them to you, but ordering both of you to God, for the sake of eternal happiness.
Our goal, for ourselves and for our children, is to meet God face to face and have Him say, “Welcome, my good and faithful servant.” It is my belief that the obedient child, who has models of obedience, and prudence, is well started on the road that will lead to that goal.